during my literature course one concept i studied stuck with me.. the concept of 'power relations'. the concept in short means that someone has power because you recognise/ fear/ admire or are in awe of it. for example a master is only a master as long as there are people who will accept that position. it applies to all relationship in our lives. someone has control over your life because you let him/her control it. it all boils down to the concept of choice. we have a choice to so something about our situation or to wallow in it. not doing anything is a choice in itself.
this concept very effectively removes the blame game.. u have no one to blame for your life but yourself. so you have to wake up at some point and take responsibility for your actions..
9 comments:
hardly. no relationship affords u a real choice. eg- u cnt choose ur father or ur mom or ur teacher right. which means ur just a cog in the wheel. even if u decide u want the power in a relationship u cant actually hav it unless the universe works that way. meaning u cn nevr be powerful in u-dad relationshp evn if u become the president of the country. so its hardly choice is it.even the people who come under u in a relationship r there becoz thats how it is, not because u chose them n said, right these people ill make my bitches. choice is the biggest myth man. breaking down the illusion of choice is the only real breakthru we can hope for.
@rebellious:very true....
its only when one side weakens that the other side is strengthened...atleast in equations of power...theres no other way....
and as long as ur willing to give control there will be ppl wanting to wrest it from you....its nature...
the concept of choices at various points in life may not be evident always....sometimes it does feel as though u have no options.....but its only that u dont realise/recognise other choices.....cause the concept of fate attracts our attention at such points and we give up.....its always easier to blame anybody else than to take responsibility.
@icy:dude....no offence intended...but u dont u have a choice in selecting ur father....but they had a choice in having u....and u also have a choice in keeping that realtionship alive and going....u choose to consider him ur father....and behave appropriately...and vice versa.
thats all i'll say.
@icy highs: u can have the power if u choose to dude... like sreicanth said u cannot choose ur dad.. but u can choose to respect him,/or not, hate him or not.. u choose to make him a part of ur life or not.. u hav tht capacity.. u and only u can empower another.. think of it like an election..
and if u say tht "people who come under u in a relationship r there becoz thts hw it is". then im guessin u think life is predestined..? jus wondering..
oh cmon even u dont belive that..sure its an argumnt but its an argumnt for its own sake..ur telling me that becoz u cn choose to act like a son or an asshole u have choice? a choice would mean that u can do one of two or howevr many things without screwing things up..otherwise its not choice its just anarchy..wch is fine by me but thats not what ur trying to say is it..in the scenario ur talking bat u hav a choice only if u hav the freedom to act either way without upsetting the equilibrium of the equation..one person must have power n it can be anyone but the sum total of the eqn shld not change wt change in power..otherwise its not choice..
as for pre-destiny..is that a word? ..anywy well i havnt made up my mind yet..i cant quite belive in the god idea but an alignment of stars or fate or whtvr that sort of decides things for u ahead of time seems plausible to me..in an energy -butterfly effect kinda way..
screwing things up for whom?? what is the choice? the freedom to choose or make/take a decsion? the point is that when u choose some one has to lose isnt tht the rule of the game.. u win some u lose some?? u cant take it all.. no matter how badly u want it all.
and except for small insignificant things in life ur choices will directly or indirectly effect some one.. when u choose it will affect the bal in power.. always.
how can u choose and not effect the power bal?
As Sreicanth said only when one side becomes submissive the other takes charge. In a nutshell, you are in control of your own destiny.
That aside, there is no need to label and analyze relationships, I think. Doing so just drives you crazy and may also strain it.
Instead of labelling (here, I am not talking about the significance of a "name"), why not just view people as our fellow adventurers (be it our parents or others whom we know) in our quest for THE TRUTH in the journey of life??
Makes sense?
Cheers!
J.C
fellow adventurers? the journey of truth?? whatevr ur tripping on i want some!
win some/lose some isnt choice.thats natural progression. maybe what i object to is the terminology. u cant call it choice if the sum of the eqn changes. only the power balance shd change ideally wen ur exercising change.
key word to be noted.. ideally.. what in this world goes by the ideal??
and yeah mayb its the terminology.. but i seriously hold the view tht choice changes the bal in power..
unless u can convince me otherwise..
I was actually taking a break when I wanted to make a comment, a rather long one, I should say.
Its in my friend s laptop. Shall post is asap.
Cheers!
J.C.
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