sometimes i feel wierd. yeah nice opening line i know. but that is all i can use to describe what im feeling... (probably a hangover form one of the previous posts..;) anyway i cant describe it.. during these moods i dont want to think. cant think period. i see the problems but dont necessarily see them.. or comprehend them. its a mental shutdown. i dont wana read. listen to music. talk. write. i cant sleep as well. but i feel damn tired.. i just lie down and stare at the damn ceiling. no im not depressed.. my mind goes blank. you might be talking to me but i just wont register anything your saying.
this euphoric mood hit me when i was in college today and going to start stitching, as usual the teacher came and started yelling that we are lagging behind blah blah... and i did not even realise she had stopped shouting at me.. i was just standing there.. looking through her.. and she had asked me a question, which i did not hear (but of course..).
so yeah basically i cant focus. and nobody exists but the sensation. even to write this post which usually takes about five minutes took me close to half an hour as i could nto concentrate and my mind kept going blank.. sort of like the picture is blurred. except im wondering if its the picture or the damn vision that is blurred..
8 comments:
welcome aboard...
i couldnt have described it more accurately.....me going thru the same bluddy phase for the coupla weeks.... jus waitin to break thru the blankness,disenchantment from the normal life.
Strolls, conversing with nature is what I do to beat stress. Sometimes work out till I get so fatigued that I can sleep nightmare-less sleep!
Take care..
Cheers!
Jyo.
@ sreicanth: hmmm yeah well you've got company dude.. and its good to know im not tht wierd. except i got get out of it pretty fast. its like i get bored staying in the same mood.. lol..
@ j sea: there isnt much nature left in chennai lol!! but thanks for the suggestion.. the work out till u blackout part sounds swell. have to de give tht one a try..
Hi,
join the club....me too goin through it...
i can see a future as well as not see one..( wish life was so simple that i could forsee it..)
anyway i have to wait for time to tell me whats gonna happen...
samyu.
ps-great blog..keep it goin..
Who's this annonymous ?
Here is the genuine 'anonymous'
The state you are in, is called 'complacent', my dear....
When you have more than you worked for, you feel this emptiness inside yourself, cause you know that you are not worth it.
And even if you intend to
Now stop trying to imitate Kurt, and let your mood be consistent with your colourful profession.
And please tell Dr. Teddybear to be more thoughtful in his comments; after all being first is not everything.
ameya......
well forcefully giving your mind an illusion of a shut down would definitely shut it down......
you go blank ...its your choice,people with fragile minds
face this problem......
they do not agree the truth that lies ahead of them,they are too afraid too keep open the eyes of their mind for it,they shut down, and fake it as a power cut.
you know what drives all of us????
purpose....
i believe it does not exist for you
a shut down is always self triggered,its always the person's choice.....
i ll give you one example ,should keep your mind awake
imagine....
what would you do if...someone was dying in front of you right then in your so called moods???
probably you could come out of it right away ...help the person.......or watch him die...with pleasure (probably in your case)
the choice is yours....
well if you have a mental shut down , logically you should not remember anything,but you have used the phrase to make your post more dramatic .
get me something better i've met people with more severe problems
@'genuine' anonymous: dude/ dudette whatever.. first of all please refrain from calling anyone on 'my' blog mr. teddy bear or any other nicknames.
second you presume a bit more than ' your' fragile mind can comprehend. donot however assume to tell me what to think.. or tell me what to do. i donot know you.. and donot want to either.
and as for your 'first love' kurt cobain.. never have in my posts have i made any refernces to him or his band. or compared myself to him. period.
as for what you have to say about my moods/ mental state whatever.. maybe i am complacent and maybe i trigger the shutdown.. but its my mood. so stop telling me what the fuck to do.
p.s: "give me something better.." its my blog. i donot need your permission to write. and i donot need to give you anything better.
lol thats a pissoff isnt it when all u want to do is vent n ppl hit u wt judegmnts and comparisons. i guess v all do it but its extrmly pissing off wen the shit hits u.lol.this i like.
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